Isn't today great?
Today is such a great day!
Everything is so great!
My, Candace.
What's got you in such a good mood?
Jeremy just asked me to go play croquet with him in the park!
Okay, well, be sure to be home in time for the barbecue.
We're gonna be watching Kermillian's Comet fly past the Earth.
A comet?
Cool!
It only comes around every seventy three and a half years.
We'll be barbecuing steaks for the whole neighborhood!
Why don't you bring Jeremy?
You had me at "steaks"!
Why is it called Kermillian's Comet, Dad?
Kermillian's Comet was named after an ancient Danville astronomer,
Augustus Kermillian,
who discovered the comet.
It's also been said that if you wish on a comet, your wish will come true.
Wow!
Come on, Ferb.
I know what we're gonna do today!
By the way,
where is Perry?
Agent P.
Sorry to disturb you, but we have an emergency.
We've just been informed that all steaks in the Tri-State area have disappeared.
This has Doofenshmirtz written all over it.
Go lay your smack-down on him, Agent P.
The fate of the world rests entirely in your hands.
What?
The fate of the world?
Uh...
Welcome to our telethon.
If you're just joining us, your dollars are helping us to find a cure for, um...
Antidisestablishmentarianism.
Goodness me, that sounds dreadful!
Oh, it is.
It...
Um...
Makes you look pale and weak, like...
this young lad.
Oh, dear.
The poor thing. Look at that.
Wait a minute.
Antidisestablishmentarianism?
That's more of an ideological stance than a disease.
Isn't it?
Uh!
Well...
Look at that.
Seems they just found a cure.
Thanks to all the viewers who donated.
Bye now.
Honey,
you ready to go?
Yeah, sure.
Hey, did you know they've just found a cure for antidisestablishmentarianism?
Great.
I can finally take off this puce ribbon.
(Song: Candace (Who's That Girl))
♪ La-la-la-la-la-la ♪
♪ La-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la ♪
♪ La-la-la-la... ♪
Hey, Candace.
Hi, Jeremy!
You remember my little sister Suzy.
But...
I thought it was just going to be us.
Well,
my folks asked me to keep an eye on Suzy for the afternoon.
Who's my favorite girl?
I am! I am!
Would you show me how to play croquet?
Well, sure thing, kiddo.
Is this pie homemade?
Yeah, my Mom made it.
I'll go get some plates out of the picnic basket.
Well, tell her that it's just–
Candace, what happened?
I don't know.
Wait here.
I'll go get a towel.
So we meet again, Candace Flynn.
There's only room for one girl in Jeremy's life.
And that is me.
And here he comes now.
Jeremy!
Here's the towel.
Sorry about the pie, Jeremy.
I–I don't know what happened.
Oh, that's okay.
You want a soda?
Yeah, that'd be great.
Here, take mine.
Oh, thank you. That was really–
Candace, there's some street performers over there that–
I'll go get another towel.
These are the blueprints for our giant observatory, Ferb.
First thing we need is a lens.
Cool.
Hey, Ferb.
New hairdo.
Check it out.
Hey, Phineas.
Whatcha doin'?
Ferb and I are building a giant observatory to watch Kermillian's Comet tonight.
Ooh, that sounds like fun.
We're gonna put on a laser light show.
And, as a grand finale, we're gonna laser our faces into the comet.
That way, when it comes back in seventy-three and a half years,
we can all show our grandchildren.
Oh, yeah.
My parents are cooking steaks for everyone.
You had me at "our grandchildren."
What?!
Steaks!
You–
You had me at "steaks."
Okay.
We need to get ten T-bones...
No steaks?
Oh, dear.
Let's try uptown.
So, you wanna see those street performers?
Sure.
I'm gonna go grab some snacks.
I'll meet you over there.
Okay.
Come on, Suzy.
Let's go...
Suzy?
Here you go.
Well, there's plenty for everyone.
Well, hello there, little girl.
Hello.
Could I have some nuts to feed the squirrels?
I'd love to, but I only have one left.
Gimme the nut!
Thank you.
Suzy?
Where are you?
♪ Now somebody, anybody, everybody scream ♪
(Song: S.I.M.P. (Squirrels In My Pants))
Aaaah!
There are squirrels in my pants!
That girl's got some serious squirrels in her pants.
There are squirrels in my pants!
♪ Tell me what's makin' you jump like that ♪
♪ S-I-M-P, squirrels in my pants ♪
♪ Ain't got no chickens, ain't got no rats ♪
♪ S-I-M-P, squirrels in my pants ♪
Squirrels in my pants!
♪ S to the I to the M to the P ♪
♪ Then maybe you can be movin' like me ♪
♪ Step right over and watch me put it down ♪
♪ S to the I to the M to the P ♪
Squirrels!
♪ Step right over and watch me put a... ♪
♪ S to the I to the M to the P ♪
♪ Who ya got back home watering your plants? ♪
♪ S-I-M-P, squirrels in my pants ♪
♪ How can I qualify for government grants? ♪
♪ S-I-M-P, squirrels in my pants ♪
♪ Yeah... ♪
♪ Hypnotize me, put me in a trance ♪
♪ S-I-M-P, squirrels in my pants ♪
♪ Get an Aunt Florence living in France ♪
♪ She can't see the- ♪
Squirrels in my pants!
♪ Step right over and watch me put it down ♪
♪ S to the I to the M to the P ♪
Squirrels!
♪ Step right over and watch me put it... ♪
♪ S to the I to the M to the P! ♪
Wow.
She had actual squirrels in her pants.
We just got served.
♪ Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated! ♪
One moment, please.
Perry the Platypus?
What are you looking at?
Oh, these.
Yes, these are my latest invention.
Steak specs.
I came up with the idea after your last little visit.
With these on,
you don't have to constantly hold a piece of steak to your black eye.
See?
I plan on mass-producing these. I'll make millions.
Let me show you.
I've stolen all the steaks in the Tri-State Area, and I keep them here in my steak containment unit or
SCU (skʌ), for short,
or...
maybe it should be SCU (sku).
I'm a little on the fence about-
Wait a minute.
What are you doing?
Oh, that?
That's just a giant heat ray in case I want to do something evil later.
Why don't you stay here with Suzy, and I'll go buy you some ice cream?
No, no, no.
You stay here.
I'll go buy the ice cream.
Oh, man.
We got served again.
I'm goin' back to culinary school.
Candace?
Here you go.
All they had was fudgie bars.
Candace, what happened?
There were so many of 'em.
The horror.
Maybe you should sit down.
So what happened again?
Are you okay?
I have something that will make you smile.
I want you to meet...
Mr. Chippy.
Get that sick creature away from me!
Candace, it's okay.
It's just a squirrel.
That's not the one I'm talking about.
What happened to her?
I don't know.
But these violent mood swings are probably a sign of deeper emotional imbalance.
What?
Bubbles.
Ladies and gentlemen.
Welcome to the Observa-Ferb-atory.
Step this way, please.
Single-file line.
The laser show will begin momentarily.
Please, no flash photography or cell phones.
Thank you.
All right, Ferb.
That's everyone.
Kill the lights.
Space -
it's really big.
It's filled with planets of all shapes and sizes and millions of shiny stars.
Space has also got huge comets soaring through it,
including one named after the ancient Danville astronomer,
Kermillian.
What's going on?
Phineas.
And now, behold...
Kermillian's Comet.
Commence laser-engraving sequence.
Phineas!
You guys put your face on a comet?
Ooh, I'm telling Mom.
Good idea, Candace.
She's gonna love it.
Wait.
You-
You're not trying to hack into the ray-gun system, are you?
Wait, what am I worried about?
You'll never guess my super-secret password.
"Doofalicious".
Access granted.
Okay, that's enough.
System overload.
Ugh!
This should be fun.
Ooh.
Wow.
Ferb, take it easy with the lasers.
Remember, we still got an 8:30 show.
Can I have everyone's attention?
Please don't panic.
We're experiencing technical difficulties.
Calmly head towards the exits in a calm, orderly–
Okay, now you can panic.
Ferb, what's happening?
That was so cool.
Not the SCU! (skʌ)
Not the–
You know, now that I'm looking at the sign, I think it really does look more like SCU (sku).
Not the SCU (sku)!
Come back here!
Perry the Platypus, come back.
Ooh.
Something smells delicious.
Curse you, Perry the Platypus.
I can't believe we drove around the whole city and couldn't find one steak.
Mom!
They used a laser to carve their faces in the comet.
Candace, I don't see anything.
No, no, no.
You could only see it from their observatory.
Come on, come on.
See?
Well, I don't see an observatory.
Sorry, everyone!
We looked all over town, and we couldn't find any steaks.
Ohh!
Oh, man!
Oh man!
No!
I even brought my own plate!
At least we can all enjoy Kermillian's Comet together.
Yeah, before it disappears for another seventy three and a half years.
Just wait!
When I'm eighty-eight,
you will be so busted!
Actually, you'd be eighty-eight and a half.
Whatever!
So, honey,
make a wish.
I wish we had steaks.
Yeah.
Me too.
I'll be honest.
I didn't think that would work.
I did not bring a plate. I thought they would be provided.
Dude, we keep getting served.
Yeah, I'm gettin' used to it.
Candace?
Are you okay?
You mean you came over to check on me?
Of course.
Oh!
There you are, Perry.
So, that's Kermillian's Comet.
Did you make a wish?
Yes.
And did it come true?
It just did.
♪ Who ya' got back home watering your plants? ♪
♪ S-I-M-P, squirrels in my pants ♪
♪ How can I qualify for government grants? ♪
♪ S-I-M-P, squirrels in my pants ♪
♪ Yeah ♪
♪ Hypnotize me, put me in a trance ♪
♪ S-I-M-P, squirrels in my pants ♪
♪ Get an Aunt Florence living in France ♪
♪ She can't see the— ♪
Squirrels in my pants!
♪ Step right over and watch me put it down ♪
♪ S. to the I. to the M. to the P. ♪
Squirrels!
♪ Step right over and watch me put it... ♪
♪ S. to the I. to the M. to the P. ♪
Wow.
She had actual squirrels in her pants.